Living life to the fullest, despite my limitations

Each of us has our own limitations that we must take into account. They influence our lives and deserve our attention if we want to reach our full potential. Each of us is a unique work in progress. We are all different, and these differences make us vulnerable to prejudice and marginalization. Despite these differences, we are also alike. We are all worthy of giving and receiving love and are searching for the path that will allow us to live fully.

What does it mean to live life to the fullest? Each person has their own definition, based on their life plan and the resources available to them. Fully does not mean without limitations or constraints. It means just the opposite: doing the best we can given the resources available and the context in which we live. This definition will evolve throughout our lives, depending on the challenges and opportunities that come our way. It also means doing our best not to add unnecessary limitations to those already present in our lives.

Falling victim to certain traps can put us at a disadvantage and lead us to a state of psychological distress. What are these traps?

1. Ceasing our efforts prematurely
2. Adopting a mentality of helplessness in situations where this is not the case
3. Needing everything to be done according to our wishes
4. Choosing absolute solitude
5. Giving up all of our hopes and interests permanently

Fortunately, there are also positive attitudes that can help us avoid these traps, reduce distress and improve the quality of our lives. Overall, it means maintaining a good relationship with ourselves, cultivating relationships with others, using our reasoning skills and taking a nuanced approach to the situations we encounter.

Let’s first look at how to maintain a good relationship with ourselves. We can find ways to be good to ourselves, including resting when we need it. We can take action to satisfy our needs and achieve our goals. We can agree to start where we currently are, knowing that we don’t have to stay there forever. This may require us to mourn the life we are leaving behind. We can make decisions about how we want to live and own our choices. Let us be our own champion and our own judge. Life can be difficult, but it is also rewarding. Let us choose to believe in the good and have hope.

Now, let’s take a look at how to cultivate our relationships with others. Living life to the fullest is about cultivating all types of friendships. Let us provide ourselves the opportunity to love and be loved and accept help from others by allowing those around us to react to what is happening to us. Let us get in touch with people who are experiencing the same disadvantages we are. Let us confide in people we can trust and be wary of people or situations that poison our lives. Let us claim our place.

Let us put our reasoning skills to use and take a nuanced approach to the situations we encounter. Let us seek out quality information. Let us strive for awareness and balance in our thinking. Let us actively seek the path that will allow us to move forward in life. Let us avoid using our limitations as excuses. Let us be truthful at all times. Let us strive to positively influence our lives and those around us rather than trying to control everything. Let us let go of pointless or unanswered questions. Let us focus on what we can achieve in this moment and for the future. Let us focus our attention on those who deserve it.

Some people around us will say unpleasant things. Before reacting to what they say, we can save ourselves a lot of frustration by asking ourselves the following questions.

• Is this person well informed?
• Are they deliberately being mean?
• Are they teachable?
• Are they an important part of our lives?
• What do we want to see happen?
• Do we have the energy to influence this person?
• Can we delegate some of the educational work?

When a person shows their determination to enjoy life, despite the challenges and limitations, by making full use of their resources and those of the people around them, they awaken in others the irrepressible desire to do the same, to live life to the fullest, whatever that means for them personally. This, in turn, makes the world a more pleasant place to live. We can all be part of the transformation if we start living life to the fullest.

 

Source : Bruno Fortin, psychologist. Published in : Journal Entre-Nous | APPAMM-ESTRIE. For more information : www.psychologue.levillage.org